Yesterdayyy . . .

So yesterday I went over to my recent ex's house because he claimed he'd wash my car for 5$. He [[sort of]] washed my car and we spent hours in the car talking . Out of a tickle fight I ended up in his lap, and next thing I knew he pulled me toward him and we were kissing. I'm so confused on everything since he told me he didn't miss me just a few days ago and I thought I stopped caring about him too. But I just found myself wanting to kiss him. So now that its the next day we talked it over (we were both confused) not sure if it was just in the moment or emotions so we said we'll just take it slow. Hopefully it'll be better than last time, since we broke up because he was wayyy tooooo jealous over my bestfriend, but if not we know that it DEFINITELY wasn't meant to be.


Au revoir !

all i need in this life of sin is ME &'d MY BESTFRIEND !

So my BESTESTEREST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD is Bishir . and today we had a sucky fight over something super stupid I don't even remember, all I remember is that I was mad to tears . so all day I was thinking on if I mattered enough to him that he'd call . But eventually I caved and called him . He told me he didn't think I was gonna call him and that I was really done . So I asked why he didnt call me and he said he thought about it , but then did his homework [[gayy]] .
     Pretty much i love my bestfriend , I put him number one before everyoneee becauseeee ;; he's stuck around for 3 years of my life &'d for one of those years I was a complete DICK to him , the 2nd yearrr we were super tight until my ex [[boyfriend at the time]] decided he hated him &'d wanted him out of my life . so slowly I did push him out of my life by not hanging out with him or returning his phone calls, etc . Yet he still stuck around &'d made it an effort to be there for me . Now we're pretty much inseparable !  my next boyfriend dumped me over my bestfriend actually . He said he couldnt "share me with another guy, even if it is my bestfriend ". Which I guess if I was a guy I would be jealous my girl is closer with another guy, but he didn't even try to get into deep conversations with me . The relationship was super shallow, who else was I going to talk to ? 

     Everyone else swears me &him are "something" or will be "something" &'d honestly we're not but idk, maybe one day we might be . I honestly wouldn't mind . I love him with everything in me and we never have a dull moment together . I trust him with almost anything , even my life ! At times I do think we depend on eachother for everything a little much , but it feels good to have someone return the feeling rather than in most of my relationships its one sided . If we were ever to be married I think we'd last just because of our respect for eachother and how we are humble to the others feelings considering how we are both SELFISH ASS PEOPLE . But for now he is &'d will always remain my bestest friend
 <33 Bishyy & Ashyyy = BFForeverrrrrrr duh ! lol .

Bienvenido !

So i haven't been on here in forever . Not that I haven't had anything to talk about , I'm just iffy on telling the world my business , but I only have two followers and one is myself so I guess I can say anything and EVERYTHING I want . So here's some little updates ;;

• I made the dance & cheer team at my school , but chose dance
• I recently quit the dance team .... they all hate me now .
• Last weekend my team competed for the first time &we won first place (however we didn't compete against anyone) which is why they hate me b/c I dont want to compete anymore
• Me &my "boyfriend" broke up almost 6/7 months ago ...
• I had a new boyfriend but he broke up with me because he was jealous of how close me & my bestfriend are (we're SUPER close)
• I feel like I'm letting my dad down for quitting the team so I went to try out for the dance show but my old coach showed up &I felt super awkward so I left
• I'm taking 18 units (& hard classes) so I can transfer to SDSU &be there with my bestfriend
• I'm a shopaholic ... seriously ... I spent 1000$++ in less than a week

I'm so confused on what I want to major in exactly , so heres a few ideas I've been throwing out ;; pre-law, business, english (which is currently my major), or public relations . then i want to minor in dance, spanish, or business. then after that i want to go to cosmetology school, fashion design school, & get a certificate in party planning & makeup artistry. Theres just so many things I want to do in my life =]

dance tryouts

so pretty much today i went to dominguez to try out for the dance team. first i'm walking around outside in the rain confused on where to go. finally, i found out where the room is and.... theres a guy like napping in the corner. he's not there for dance tryouts either. so i wait for a bit hoping someone shows up. and i realize after 30 mins that noone is showing up. so i go next door to the dance room; locked. i guess it was cancelled or something yet not one girl showed up. so i drove all the way over there for nothing. ugh, i have the worst of luck =/

She Devil

So I recently just realized my boyfriends mom doesn't like me. I mean she doesn't say she doesn't like me, but I can just tell. When she's mad at him she won't say a word to me. She's ok with me picking up her son only if I swing by and pick up the younger sons. Which honestly pisses me off, like it's not my responsibility to get any of them really. I get my boyfriend because he's my boyfriend but their not my kids. And it trips me out like I do it as a favor, but if we don't pick up the younger one like 5 minutes after he gets out of school she's on the phone yelling at my boyfriend. He doesn't drive so 1. its not his fault and 2. its 5 minutes. Plus they live a few blocks from the school! Here's a thought, make the little boy walk! He's what 13?! Also, if my boyfriend goes out with me, there she is texting him nonstop. Its honestly rude and irritating. He's 18, we're at the movies, my house, beach, like he doesn't need to be baby-sitted. And one day I walk into the house just to say hi, and before I even get in she's like "sorry sweetie but its after 9 you have to go home". Umm, hi? Another day I cooked them breakfast potatoes for dinner, also there was some bacon and eggs. She gets home late, says "thank you" but then goes into the kitchen, chops up some cilantro and other crap and adds it to the potatoes and comes out with her plate looking COMPLETELY different from what I made. To me it was obvious she wanted them to be all "ooh and ahh; mom I want what you have", which they did, and it was unnecessary. I'm not trying to steal her family or become mom, I definitely have no interest with that. I only care about my boyfriend. Then to recently find out that one of his female friends doesn't want to go to prom and she offered to buy her ticket. Just wow; no comment. Last night me and him decided to go out to dinner. I went inside, said hello, he told his dad he was going out and we left to the car. We get inside the car and she comes over and tells him his dad is furious he's going out because he went out yesterday and he can't be going out all the time. I think this woman is waaayy to involved in her children's lives and needs to let go. I don't know how long I can deal, or is that what her motive is? Well hopefully when he goes off to college in the Fall this petty crap is over.

Anniversary

So April 28th was me and my boyfriend's one year anniversary. Honestly I've never been with anyone for like a year and neither has he so it was a bit of a big deal. It was a Wednesday so we both had school so we decided to celebrate on two days. He wanted to take me out to dinner and surprise me, the surprise was on him when he found out the restaurant had closed down. So we were all dressed up for nothing. It was supposed to be an elegant italian restaurant; he wanted to take me there because I love italian food. We ended up going to Tantalum because it looked great on the outside, but the food I ordered was super spicy and ended up hurting my tummy for the rest of the night so no "happy time". Lol. I had a surprise for him as well. Saturday I planned for us to go to Flight Deck where you can simulate flying a F-16 in combat. I knew he'd love it, and he did. He pretty much praised me for the rest of the day (which made my day) but then we couldn't go out later because his parents wanted to go out and he had to watch his brother. The night before we went out though I had checked on his facebook and seen that he was continuously messaging some chic back and forth since January, and nowhere in the convo did he mention spending time with his girlfriend or the fact he had one. It sounded a bit flirtatious and pissed me off so I didn't get time, or even want to at that matter, to finish his other present which was a jar that was going to have 365 reasons why I loved him in it. At that moment it could have been 365 reasons why I hated and was going to hurt him. Lol. In the morning he cleared up the situation by saying he was sorry and didn't consider it as flirting and would never talk to her again. I guess you can say problem solved. But I also messaged her and told her I didn't appreciate their conversations and it needed to cease. It did.

Kinkos

So me & my boyfriend went to Kinko's today.. well actually tonight. I found these little Spanish cheat sheets that I thought would help me out in Spanish class. Well, I figured since I didn't want to pay 6.95 for these small little laminated sheets (you know what I'm talking about, they're everywhere, and they always have little facts on things you want to learn) so I told him to just copy it since, hey, we're in a building full of copy machines. Right when he puts the sheet in, a worker comes over and scolds us on how we're not supposed to do that and that's why they sell them. The only thing I'm wondering is where in the world did this old woman come from? Well, my boyfriend said she was staring had been staring at us since the moment I walked in behind him and wrapped my arms around him. He became extremely upset. Which is understandable since, we haven't before, but we're starting to notice the many people that seem to have a problem with our relationship. To us it's like honestly get over it. I'm black, he's white (well half and half Hispanic), on the inside we are two humans that have a major attraction to one another and our race does not matter. I love him for him, he loves me for me. We had went to Knott's one day, and while we were walking holding hands an old man sitting on a nearby bench jerked forward immediately and stared at my boyfriend with so much hatred in his eyes it shocked me. Jokingly I said, "Babe, I think you did something to him he looks angry," and he replied "Oh, I was hoping you didn't see that. He's mad because..." He didn't finish; he didn't have to. We both knew why the guy looked angry but that honestly didn't put a damper on our day, just turned into an interesting story for me to tell. There's been more situations, a bit smaller. Like a group of kids sitting in Jack in the Box that were chattering to one another and immediately stop when they see my boyfriend grab my hand to walk me out; or a girl at the mall who puts on a stank face when she's sees us walk in with our arms around each other. I just think its really sad when people have this type of prejudice in their hearts and cannot just see a happy couple.